88 mph, suckas.

greetings, internet goers of the past. i am writing to you from the future (mid-October 2009) to inform you that the Sox have won the AL East. this, contrary to reports from the earlier part of the year that a.j. burnett, c.c. sabathia, m.c. teixeriaieria, and (of course) d.s. jeter would lead the jankees to a 160-2 record.

but nay! Las Mediasrojas took the crown by a game over the yankees, who fell flat on their faces in August after alex rodriguez went down with a curious injury. to put it bluntly, one of his balls exploded. take a guess why.

coming soon (i really, really hope), a commentary on ARod's now infamous interview with Peter Gammons. actually, since i am writing to you from the future, i can say with a high level of certainty that i will never get around to doing this.

also, put all your money into Chrysler. right. now. you'll thank me sometime around August.